Russian Spies: The James Bond of the Soviet Cinema

Oh, the Seventeen Moments of Spring....

I don't know who made it more - Vyacheslav Tichonov's Colonel Isayev, better known as Max Otto von Stierlitz, or the music of Mikael Tariverdiyev...

Far removed from the 007 movies in so many ways, this Soviet TV series is in so many other ways the same to those raised in the USSR as James Bond movies to the western world.

When asked to describe the plot or the action, I usually say that nothing really happens. For one full TV season nothing really happens - other than the main character's internal monologue.

This is not completely accurate: there are lots of events happening, in fact, there is History taking place right before our eyes.  What's more, history is being made right before our eyes - and it sometimes seems it is being made by this one person - this one that is not really doing anything other than thinking.  There is not much talking, no stunts that I remember of... there even are dozens of historical inaccuracies in the film - side by side with documentary footage. There are lots of plain blunders. And yet millions and millions of people have watched it hundreds of times.  And you know what, it's more than worth it.

Russian Words: Current Events

It appears that two major themes dominate our news stream of late: the oil spill (or, rather, a series of them) and the illegal immigration related debates.  Both are topics not completely unknown in Russia, so here are the Russian words for you:

OIL (the fossil fuel kind) is нефть ("neft").  Which is why you have company names like Gazprom Neft, the oil arm of Gazprom, Rosneft, Transneft, Yugansknefegaz, etc., all oil companies.   

Cooking or salad oil, on the other had, is масло ("MAHS-lah"), or, to be exact, растительное масло ("rahs-TEE-tehl-noh-yeh MAHS-lah"), as opposed to сливочное масло ("SLEE-vahch-nah-yeh MAHS-lah"), or butter.


As far as the illegal immigration issue (you may be surprised, but apparently there are plenty of people interested in  moving TO Russia), the phrase is almost identical to the English one: in Russian we say

 нелегальная иммиграция ("neh-lih-GAHL-nah-yah ihm-mih-GRAH-tsee-yah")

For the most part, нелегальные мигранты ("neh-lih-GAHL-nih-yeh mih-GRAHN-tih"),"illegal migrants", or simply нелегалы ("neh-lih-GAH-lih"), the illegals, as they are more frequently called, come from the former Soviet republics, especially those in South-East Asia.

British Open... what is that?

British Open remains a hot topic on the web, the English-reading web that is.  It appears, however, that the RuNet, as we call the Russian-language part of the World Wide Web, is hardly bothered.  This will probably tell you that golf is not one of the most popular sports in Russia.  Honestly, I learned about its existence from English-Russian dictionaries and language textbooks, and I had not seen a live golfer until, if I remember it right, 2007.

Apparently, this is not all that surprising.  According to Wikipedia, there were no golf courses (none!) in the whole then-USSR until 1988!  That is 22 402 200 square kilometers (8,649,538 sq mi) and not a single golf course!  The same Wikipedia article states that even now, there are only six golf clubs in the whole country.  On a more positive note, though, thirteen more golf clubs / country clubs are being built.

That having been said, there is - or should I say was - such thing as The Russian Open, part of PGA European Tour,  and Russia does have a National Golf Association and a national team. 

The other thing I have to mention is, of course, that as you move up the social ladder, the closer to the executive world you get, the more you will hear about golf.  But then you will also hear about a numerous other things non-existent for the majority of Russia's population.

For those learning the Russian language, here is an interesting Golf Glossary.  While it was obviously developed for beginner golfers and focuses primarily on explaining the concepts, you will notice that each word has an English equivalent.  And since there are only 47 items on the list (at the time of writing), it shouldn't be impossible to use this reference as both a Russian-English and an English-Russian "Golf Dictionary". Happy Putting!


No girls or spies for today - sorry.

Russian Spies. Or, rather, foreign spies and Russian scouts.

The recent Russian Spy Ring affair has been getting quite a buzz - on both sides of the Ocean...  Whatever that story is really about -  I grant you, we will never know. But it reminded me of something...  I remember asking what the difference was between "shpion" (spy) and "razvedchik" (scout or intelligence officer, depending on the context). How would you answer a question like that from a -say- five-year-old?  The answer I got was that when they are ours, they are "razvedchiki", intelligence officers.  When they work for the enemy's side, they are, of course, "shpiony", spies. Other than that, the unspoken assumption was that they are the same. My first lesson in semantics... lol. On a more serious note, once my mother - who understood some basic English - helped a confused foreign couple discover the store they were in did not sell "halva"... or rather was (rather permanently) out of that supposedly-Russian supposedly-delicacy. All she said was, "Halva? Halva - no! Halva no here."  The following morning (!) she was called to drop by "Department One", where a non-uniformed officer asked her if she remembered the papers she had signed... about not talking to foreigners, you know, those papers... I guess Big Brother was watching.

Russians, Soviets, girls, drinks... and much more

It's about things Russian and Soviet, stories I have heard and history I have lived  - encompassing pretty much the lifespan of that monster called the Soviet Union, from before its "birth" to after its collapse.

It's about the Russians as I know them - by the way they are not all hot-blond-spy-mail-order-brides.  (Some are guys, you know... most are not blond... and quite a few are not hot at all)

And yes, I will teach you some important vocabulary - both Russian (hopefully, we will go beyond "Putin", "Lenin", "vodka" and "nyet") and Renglish (it's like Spanglish, only for us Roosskies).

Don't worry, Russian girls / singles / dating / brides (and a long list of those hot search words) will not be deprived of attention either.

It will be very not logical, and hopefully not academic at all.  But I promise you - it will be authentic.  And honest. Questions welcome.